Trapped In Spontaneous Disintegration

Days pass, years even
The turmoil only a memory
Repressed, long forgotten
Only a memory

Rationalized all doubt away
I am just a normal human
A normal human
Who only sleeps
If drugged to submission

Nightmares hound me
Failing to my death
Incognito

Myself, unglued
Eternally trapped
In spontaneous disintegration

What is happening?
Nothing
But I can’t sleep
Still deep inside, I wait for the day

The day of reckoning
The day that will end
All this torment

And I will bring this torment
Bring it all upon others